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I'm schizophrenic.

Lights out forever. it's a long time. tiptoe dancing through the pumpkin patch. wind running through your twirling fingers. the plant stems begin to curl and so do my eyebrows. purple sparkles scatter and rush through the air. do you hear that fait sound up ahead?? it's chanting of smoke dancing. beating drums beating your heart. boom! there goes a shooting star. so it stops for a moment, it's the last one you'll see. you know your point of view is lifted, when you see your reflection in the mud puddle. with a bubbling stomach and your popped ears you charm on. skip twirling through the mountains and through the twisted melting trees. its so cold you're sweating, tears full of yellow green paint that splash purple and blue on your fathers shoes. dreaming of your body parts splitting the wind in two while you push through. your breathing smells of sugar coated lemon drops and your lips taste like rose. you stretch and feel the noise your skin makes. you fall off the pebbled park bench and the wood chips enter your skin. those red shoes scream at you from a 90 degree angle. you stand on your fingertips and shuffle through the weeds. the dust is red, and so is your nose extending through your mind.
what's not to come
what's not to come through
what's not going to come through with it.
what's not to come through
what's not to come.
vision
vizion.
envizionyou.

Getting into your own art.

Corner of your heart.

Everything is okay, thank you.
"I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, And that enables you to laugh at life's realities.”

I can't concentrate today.
I guess being drunk two nights in a row isn't helping much..

Last night I went to the "Why?" concert.
I don't know what concerts do to my body and mind, but it just drives me to live my life completely through music.
I just want to play music.. all the time..
I've been having the best musical experiences lately, just SO many opportunities to play with others..
It's a sign! I must start playing more! :)

No new news I guess.. I'm moving into the blue house with Devon and this boy named Chris.
Chris has a drum set! Chris plays music! OH! Ask me if I'm excited!
My good friend Kalin and I made this great experimental song.. Actually, we're stilll working on it, but it's turning out great!
We've spent 10 hours already recording this song..

I love this life right now.
I love everyone in it.
I could use a lot more of people though..

Hayley knows who I am, even though I'm feeling very grounded right now:

I am going away for a while
I'll be back don't try and follow me
I'll return as soon as possible
See I'm tryin' to find my place
It might not be here where I feel safe
We all learn to make mistakes,

And run from them
From them
With no direction
We'll run from them
From them
With no direction

I'm just one of those ghosts
Traveling endlessly
Don't need no road
In fact they follow me
And we just go in circles

Now I'm told that this is life
Pain is just a simple compromise
So we can we get what we want out of it
Someone care to classify
Broken hearts and twisted minds
So i can find, someone to rely on,

And run to them
to them
Full speed ahead
Oh you are not
Useless
We are just

Misguided ghosts
Traveling endlessly
The ones we trusted the most
Pushed us far away
And there's no one role
We should not be the same
I'm just a ghost
And still they echo me
They echo me in circles.

This room has fallen asleep.

Cigarette, coffee, blog.. I could get used to this..
The economy has shot my hours at work down and it's fall break.
I have the day off from school AND work. I don't know what to do!
But it feels great because I've been wanting to do nothing for a long time..
Time away from work makes me appreciate it even more. Last night I had to close, but it's okay because I had Sarah and other fun people to dance the night away with.

I've been complimenting so many people lately and it's pretty fun! I just hope they don't hear me compliment another person so they don't think it's sincere. But! There is so much beauty in people..
I love saying hi to people that come into my work, because you can tell some people don't really go out and when you actually acknowledge them, they beam or they shy away.. It's cute though because sometimes you get into conversation and you learn a lot about people's emotions and personality.
People are SO interesting to me.

It's funny because I had so much to write about this morning, when I was walking into my house ideas were just flooding me.. I guess I couldn't get to my computer in time..
My parents have been out of town, so Devon and I have been taking advantage of a bed and a fridge.
We're usually cramped onto a twin sized bed, shivering all night, or sweating profusely.
Here's a rant,
Devon dyed her hair yesterday.. white. It looks SO amazing! I've been wanting to do something new to my body too.. Like a new piercing or something.. I don't want to cut my hair cause I'm losing it, so I'm trying to keep as much strands on my head as I can. I knew I was going to have problems in my life, but I didn't know balding was going to be one. haha It's okay, I'll just look like an adult baby..

On another note, I've been obsessed with elle's pictures lately. Jamie King is beautiful. When I become well known for music, I hope someone will ask me to do photo shoots like this:

inspiration

"Tell yourself that you are healthy and balanced, and energy will come."
Thank you Alandra, happy travels, I'll be writing you soon. :)